What is Sin?

Part IV


What is Sin? What is not a Sin? What is Vice? What is Virtue?What is  sin to me may not be necessarily a sin to others. I feel to do a certain act is a sin to me but others feels that it is his duty to do that act and hence it is not a sin.

What is that we learn from the above context is it is the power of thinking or way of thinking that changeth the behavior and attitude of a person .The sinful act which I am thinking to do may not be the same for others.

For example, having sex with woman other than a married life partner is a sin for some people , but it may not be a sinful act  for some people as they think that as long as you are not forcing or coercing a  woman to do that act .According to Hindu scriptures and as a matter of fact , in other religions also , having sex with other women is  a sin only and will be punishable in the hell after death.
Some people believe the existence of God  and if they believe God they should  believe in hell and heaven after death. If  they believe in this , they should also believe in punishment for various crimes and sins after their death. According to Eeshopanishath, the punishments for different sins are given. The man will be drowned  alive in boiled oil  or his eyes are pierced with red hot iron rods or he will be asked to swim in the flesh and blood of a river called Vytharini. But how many of us do believe in such type of punishments awaiting after death?

Some people argue that as per the laws of nature , if you do some mistake or crime , it will have spontaneous reaction  and God will be observing and punish the guilty. That means for every action , there is a reaction.

Because of gravitational power , all living and non – living things are sticking to the earth and not falling nor floating in the air. Like that , since God is  supervising us , and some people are balancing the good and bad deeds , the human race is still existing and surviving. I can not say all are bad people in this world .There are so many  good people in this world  who live for others and  does all good things , trusting in  God. Because of this balancing act , which is  supervised by God, man is still existing and surviving.

Another  example ,we can see some of the people taking revenge against others. Police  are killing the naxalites in  encounters and naxalites are killing police in  landmines. Terrorists are being killed by our army as they are sneaking into our borders illegally and in turn terrorists are killing army, police , para- military personnel  and innocent people.

In some regions , because of faction feuds , so many people are killed . Since you have killed my father and grand father , I have killed your mother and grand mother. The scores of killing are increasing and people are literally killed for petty reasons. Since a man has raped his wife , he was killed by the husband . That means for every bad action ,  there is bad reaction. As a result , there is a cascading effect of bad things in the society.

That means what we think is a sin is not at all sin in other’s view. That is how , in this  society, the crime has cascading effect .Crime begets crime and sin begets sin. A dacoit thinks that looting other’s belongings is not a sin. Because in his view , he thinks  that it is his livelihood. A prostitute thinks that , having sex with so many people is not a sin , because she thinks that it  is her profession. A politician  or a bureaucrat or a clerk in a office  thinks that taking bribes in cash or kind is not a sin or crime , because he thinks that it is his right to take. Corruption is treated as common thing as they do some  extra ordinary service to the person. In their  view , it is not a sin. Government  pays good salaries , allowances and provide housing accommodation , still he feels that  taking bribe is his fundamental right. Political leader takes bribes and say that it is used for party funds. In his view it is not a sin or crime because , he thinks that he is sacrificing his entire life for  the cause of people  and society.

What do we learn from this ?  To do an act or not , the difference makes in thinking. If   you think  good. good things will happen and if you think bad , bad things will happen.

Children are very innocent till they reach certain age. Because their thinking capacity is very limited up to taking food and playing  games. If he does not   see his  mother , he starts crying. Once he see kis his  mother , his joy knew no bounds. Child always see  goodness  in bad things also. He thinks the razor blade is a  playing  tool and try to play with that . He goes to fire and touch it .As a mother who takes care of his  child not to play and touch , the God also always like  a mother caution us not to venture into bad  things and do bad acts. Like  a  child , man must realize and behave and see all goodness in bad things also. He must visualize the existence of God in all like a child sees his mother .He must feel the existence of God. Then man would certainly realize what is good and what is bad , what is  sinful and what is not. He can balance  the good and bad and judge the right thing like a balancing machine. Like a peacock , which takes  only milk out of mixture of milk and water , man must absorb the good things in all. I can see   the divinity  with in you , so as the same way you can also see the divinity with in me.I can see the nature’s bliss in rocks, mountains, lakes, rivers, sky , earth , trees and  animals . If  I can see the nature’s bliss in all , I can see the existence of God in all things.

See a God in sickle, see a God in rifle, see a God in bomb, see a God in axe, see a God in stone , see a God in a woman, see a God in trees , see a God in darkness  and see a God in devil . Then you will certainly be empowered and enlightened.


Jai Ganesha

TO DO OR NOT TO DO

Part VI
Sometimes I feel that for any  work to proceed , there must be God’s blessings . If it is destined to happen, it will happen. I saw so many people traveling in flights, trains, buses but in so many cases, they reach safely and in few cases , met with accidents . Recently, accidentally one bus was caught fire and so many people were burnt to death. People go to Manansa  Sarovara  , which is said to be ,an  arduous task of  journey , feared with terrorists problem, but they returned back safely with all smiles in their faces.

I saw an old couple traveling all the time safely with out any problem through out their life. But suddenly, in a pilgrimage, husband collapsed and died there only. And he was lucky enough to have his cremation there only. We are hearing so many Muslims devotees breathed last at Mecca said to be great boon for them. Hindu People literally spend their old age to die at Kashi .

Why does this happen? Some people die suddenly and some people live longer in spite of their risky ventures. Some people are born rich and some people are seeing hell on earth for their daily existence. Some people sleep in air conditioned   rooms and some people on platforms. What is the real reason for this? When, in the view of the God, all are same, why are these disparities?
Also I would like to share that when I want to do some thing, I can not do.
When I do not think that this can not be happened now, suddenly it will happen. The saying “man proposes and God disposes’’ is really linked with one’s own karmas. I want to buy a land and I can not do at that time. But suddenly I can buy a good house at later date. Why are these happened? If I want something, I may not get and if I don’t want something, I may get it. Is this called  a destiny?

Hindu philosophy says that these are all one’s own karmas in their previous births. If he did good things in his past life, he would enjoy good life in this birth and vice versa. I am not yet certain on this. Because to believe in this, we should believe in past life and rebirth. If we believe in past life, we should believe in reincarnation.

I saw some people struggling for existence despite their hard work. Some people earn millions over night with out much hard work. Some people earn millions by illegal means such as corruption, mafia, land grabbing, killing, looting, flesh trade and cheating etc. These people, have had any fear of God, they would have not gone to do such illegal activities. Some people who earns by illegal means would give their part of earnings on charitable purposes to redeem their sins. I saw so many unknown bhaktas are dropping millions of rupees and gold in hundi at Tirumala. I have a doubt that these people are even corrupting God by offering their moneys earned through illegal activities.

Scriptures have clearly notified what a man should do and not to do. Man should follow certain ethics and code of conduct in society. But the present generation has no   values and their main aim is to earn money and enjoy life by whatever means. Under these circumstances, I get a doubt why are these people  not getting the wrath of the God?

Some people say that the present phenomena of poverty, unrest, depression, unseasonable rains, drought, accidents, and shortage of drinking water, floods, fires, earth quakes and communal killings are the result of anger of God because man is forgetting the true existence of God.
Man is also not able to developing the relationship with God because human beings are not really convinced that how God would save them out of this crisis. If His own children are suffering like this, why God is not taken another reincarnation and save this humanity on this universe.

Destruction is the order of the day in today’s world. Beautiful nature is perishing with pollution. Science and Technology are creating wealth and comforts, but at the same time playing havoc with the health of people. Some countries are dying with no proper food and medicines and some countries are facing with mental and psycho problems for not having proper relationships. Nuclear war threatens, Bio chemical war threatens brought the life of human beings to a halt and frightening. Countries are fighting for gaining regional powers and religion dominance.

Time is passing day in and day out.  Relationship between God and human beings are not progressing .There is no strong bond  between Man and God . God is also annoyed how to  save this humanity with so many fragmented conflicts and views. Nature itself put to testing times and Nature may perish or may not survive the onslaughts of the deeds of the men. God is put to test as nature is put to test. Hence it is high time that God takes the task and reengineer and rejuvenate the thinking of humans and human life.

Jai Ganesha

Film Story Writer

'What happened next?

"The hero did not think that this would happen. It does not happen what he thinks. It's going to be what he does not think. "

My favourite hero Kalyan Babu and his son Chaitanya sitting in the sofa opposite to me and listening  the story. I have been waiting for this opportunity for a long time.  it is sheer luck  for me and not everyone get this chance. The hero of the great heroes  is  in front of me and I am lucky to narrate  a story exclusively created keeping him in mind  to get a chance of becoming a film writer of established production company.

Can you please Stop telling the story? ' Kalyan babu paused our discussion for a while.

"What happened Sir?"

"Two ways ahead of him. Would he leave his wife for his son, who is his only life and death , or is he going to leave his son for a wife who is responsible for his life?"

I am still looking forward to hero Kalyan Babu as I am telling  the story of 'Turn of the Events',
almost reaching climax scenes .

Time passed  for two hours. This is Lunch time. I have been telling   the story since  nine o'clock in the morning. I am very grateful to both of  them for listening to my story so patiently.


"How did he make his decision as a father? What are the reasons for making such a sacrifice for his son? What happens in the climax? "

Kalyan Babu was in a hurry mood.

The hero got up and said, 'The shooting is timed! My schedule is from the morning. Will  you come back next  week? Your story is so innovative. Our final decision depends upon climax  " he said.

'' Thank you very much  sir .. for patiently hearing my story. I will come next Sunday at the same time and will narrate climax of my story " I told him so humbly.

'' Next Sunday I have a few schedules. This is our PA phone number. Let's phone him. "

Hero Kalyan Babu and his son Chaitanya  went in a Mercedes car.

I'm waiting for the auto outside the Studio to reach my flat at Krishna nagar.

I had to wait for the weekend to come .

On Sunday , I fully prepared myself, neatly dressed, polished my shoe shining, very anxious , tensed  to meet the hero .

I called up PA of Kalyan Babu to enquire about hero appointment.

'' Hello ... Am I speaking to PA of Kalyan Babu Pl ?  ''

'' Yes ​​.. who are you? '' the other side a loud voice is heard.

'' I am Murthy , a story writer ... I have  appointment with Kalyan Babu today. Sir, I want to meet Hero "

'' Murthy ... big story writers do not get appointment of the Hero. He is busy with the  director.. You may not get his  appointment today . The hero is very busy"

PA appears to be  a bit worse for me.

'' Hello Sir, Hero was very much  impressed. Last Sunday he and his son heard my story synopsis. I was asked to meet him today"

"So you come to Nataraj studio," he said.

I was very happy. I prayed all the Gods and rendered all Slokas silently . I took a owe that I will pay a visit to Tirupati to offer my hair in a spiritual tonsuring ceremony at the hills.

As I thought, I reached the studio in time . Tight Security around the Gates are stopping the people .Those who have passes are permitted.

"Sir .. My name is Murthy .. I want to meet Kalyan Babu PA. Will the phone be made? " I requested  Security in charge.

He looked at me and phoned  saying "Well, sir."

'' You wait a couple of minutes Sir...He seems to be busy . ''

Waiting under a wall in the sun outside, Time passed  for two hours.I  met with security personnel.

"It's been two hours back since I met you , nothing is heard " I said to security in charge.

Four in the evening, six, eight, and ten' O ' clock in the night. I did not get any call from the studio. I couldn't have lunch also.

My efforts to meet my Hero went in vain.

No phone number connecting Hero PA or Hero'

************************************************** ************************************************** ***
I got a chicken call  from my mobile.
I was in deep  sleep through out the night .

Is it? Is it true? Is itn't true?

Still I feel like talking to Kayan Babu.

On the opposite side of  my cot,  the bundles of papers are laughing at me as I filled in all bunch of papers with my film  story at that  night.  The story of ' Bendu ' cinema written by me and the conspicuous name written on the  script file laughing at me.

I lately realised that  it was my fantasy dream in the night.



Rao vbm



************************************************** ************************************************** ***

EPIC OF SOIL

Epic of Soil
-------++++---------

At the times when first monsoon arrives
Drizzling rain drops makes earth  refresh
Catching soil fragrance with great aroma
With my two palms making a bowl
Writing my epic of soil

Trampling wet fields
Making soil ready for plants
My beloved farmers
Dancing on the wet fields
Flowers are blossoming on their soiled feet
I am touching their feet as a mark of respect
Writing my epic of soil

Wearing silver bracelets
Their hands making waves of sounds
My beloved women in the fields
Sowing plants in the wet fields
Touching their feet as a mark of respect
Writing my song of soil

Clay trampled feet
Could create wonderful pots
Clay took the shapes
The creator , the potter
Touching his feet as a mark of respect
Writing my poem of soil

Sleeping soil , eating soil
Walking soil , living soil
Making soil as their soul
I bow my head to their affinity with soil
Writing my lyric of soil

Witnessing red soil that glued
To the roots of peanut plants
Witnessing black soil that glued
To the roots of sugar cane plants
The particles of soil
Are my alphabets to my poem

Born in soil
Brought up in soil
Dying in soil
I dedicate my poem to such saints
Who spared their life for mother earth

I am not searching for normal people
To dedicate my poem
I am in search of  people
Who breathe the air of soil
Who shaped their life in the soil
Who does penance in their fields
Who lives in nature
Die for nature
Waiting for such people
To dedicate my poem for ever.

---------+-+-----------+--+--+-----
Rao vbm


My Telugu poem ' Matti Vedam'  translated in English by me

   

28.04.2018

WHITHER DIFFERENCE?

Some times I feel why some people are so aggressive and radical ?. Some times the behavior of some people  is not convinced to me properly. I saw a top Guruji who appears to be DESCIPLE OF SAI is very kind to his devotees or followers. He not only wish all his followers with his divine grace but also gives very costly gifts .The same Guruji , when a hapless beggar asks for alms at traffic signals , abuses beggar and says' the Govt. should ban begging and  I hate this beggars and its menace'. I really wonder God should show mercy to all and kind to all human beings and animals .But this baba was so unkind to them , he was reluctant to see them , did not peep from out of his air conditioned car. But this baba , had plenty of money out of contributions by rich followers. He established so many asrams in international level.

In second incident , I saw recently a baba called 'porlu dandala swamy 'who rolled himself traveling 2500 km so far in the name of God. I saw people just watching and never spared even one rupee for his noble cause, including me . why is this happening?

This baba is penniless and expects nothing from the people. That baba was richest and expects five star hotel facilities , air conditioned cars and flights tickets from his devotees.

Then who is correct and who is the Messenger of God? Interestingly both the babas are having a lot of followers.

I saw an ardent devotee of baba once upon a time , suddenly started to hate the same baba , because he could not solve his problems. I do not think babas will solve all our problems. How a baba can solve a problem of getting a USA son - in -law or owning a skoda car or a bungalow at Beverley Hills?

These are one's own karmas, I believe. But I saw some people say that they got wealth and health after meeting some babas. How far is it correct?
A man to become a baba or servant of God shall possess the three basic qualities.

1. Loving all irrespective of status, caste, color both humans and animals
2.kindness and mercy to all
3.sat - chida- anandam
I feel Mother Theresa was a saint after Sai Baba of Shirdi. Those are living examples. They never cared for their self and lived for others.

Jai Ganesha

I WILL REBORN AGAIN AS A TREE

I WILL REBORN AGAIN AS A TREE

~

~

And we need to be  exploded like a Nuclear Bomb!

 Should   become another fierce  Tsunami!

Must roar like  Lion  and bounce like a  Tiger!

The unfortunate victmised hapless Nirbhayas

Must send these bastards to gallows

And these rapists have to go alive to the cemetery!

Kidnapping innocent babies and children

 The mafia murderers must be shown their hell

The working women in the office molested by  Rougue Superiors

 Must see them hanging in public

 The bigots cowardly forcing  children into prostitution

Teach them a lesson with the  crucifixion !

Forgetting  the sanctity of marriage

Lust makes them blind  for even incest sex

 These sadists  hands and legs must be taken off

 Strangely fierce characters in the civilised society must be eliminated

I'm  running against the tidal waves of  the oceans

My pen speaks volumes of untold stories

Their misery, Their supression, Their opression

 On the peaks of the lava mountains

I'm going to be buried and burned

And would become ash  again in this soil

I will reborn again as a tree to see a new society that is cleansed!

------------------------------------

bhanu varanasi/ 14.08.2018

ARE GODS REALLY HAPPY?

PART II


ARE GODS REALLY HAPPY?

Some times I feel that relationship with the people is necessary or not. Because relationship means a strong bond between two or more people. That relation ship should not collapse for silly reasons .I feel there is no true relationship in this world without any gains monetary or physically. You are pampering your children   and investing hundreds of thousands of rupees on your children because at later old days you think that they will be helpful to you. Children may take care or may not take care after you become old. That is the different matter. What I mean to say that, in this world , nothing is selflessly done in the process of giving and  taking.

Parents love their children more than anybody in this world. But children wont give the same  love after they become older because their priorities would change on their families  .Not only parent – children relationship, it would effect , it effects on every relationship. Teacher - student, Doctor – patient ,Owner - servant and Guru - Sishya.

In Hindu epic , ' MAHA BHARAT' , Guru dronacharya   asks Ekalvya ( His student) to present his thumb of right hand as Guru Dakshina (presentation) so that he can not win against pandavas in the war. This type of relationship is certainly motivated by malafied  intention. But what type of relationship should we maintain with God?. In Hindu religion we can get God's Blessings by offering something to God as  'nyvedya' means offering with dishes made up of mixing of banana, jaggery, honey, milk and ghee . Does it mean that GOD will be happy only when you offer something in kind or cash. With out  offerings , can,t we reach God?. I  feel  that , we human beings , would offer to God because we think GOD also behaves like a human being expecting something from human beings? Existence is the truth and non -existence is the untruth. We believe so confidently that we should appease the power which is existingly non- existing .Because We accept truth untruthfully. Existence of God is not experienced by common people like us . It is only a powerful imagination of human beings and listening to the great experiences of great people. Since we have not literally experienced the existence of God , We do believe that , God is existing. If we believe that God is existing , we will certainly try to know where about of Him. According to Hindu scriptures  GOD is not  living in one of the 14 planets He is omni -present and immortal and also existing  everywhere. He is existing in our mortal bodies and leaves us along with our soul. So try to search and build relationship with your soul and body,, so that you can see the God with in you.

Under these context, does the relationship with God   necessary , as God is with in us .

ARE GODS HAPPY?

ARE GODS HAPPY ?

Man will never be happy whatever he accomplished simply because he is unnatural , away from nature's principles

PART I

Desires are the root cause for the sadness and misery. But if desires are not fulfilled, we are outdated and out of the race. If we are not running with the crowd we are out in the game. If we can not catch the bus, we will miss the bus and will never reach the destination. 

To some extent man must be possessive in the sense to acquire materialistic things, to develop the relations with the people , to be  possessive of  the kith and kin , to control the family. 

Depression starts when a man can not reach the above goals nor control the things. Then  man will turn to GOD and blame him for his inability.

Destiny is the another word we use for every act we do. I believe behind thedestiny ,there is another act to do that is hard work and effort. If we do not put our effort, we can not reach the goal. If we put our efforts and failed in the attempt , that is destiny , I believe.

Lord krishna says in Geetha ABOUT THE KARMA in an excellent way.

Truly say I am not yet on spiritual path. My mind is craving for so many things , to posses materialistic wealth rather than spiritual wealth.

If I have a flat , I feel I do not have  an independent house.If my children are pursuing higher studies, I feel they are not attempting Foreign Courses.If I am blessed with a good job. I feel I am not getting another post or I feel I am not getting other's  post  where he appears to be enjoying.

Resulting effect is mental unrest and depression. because if I am not happy, my wife is not happy , there by children are not happy . If I am not happy , my colleagues are not happy , there by society is not happy.

If I am not happy , my neighbors are not happy .Thereby creating an environment where we are all not happy. Why is this happening? The aggregate of negative vibrations of all together creates a storm of unrest thereby frustration in the society.

I am not happy because I am not getting what I want. I am not able to pray God  happily because , He is not giving me what I want.

The God gave me enough education and knowledge , decent living and happy life. Still I am not happy BECAUSE I CRAVE FOR UNKNOWN THINGS.

Last but not least ' Are Gods Happy ? ' as God  created a most unrealisic , unnatural himan beings on the earth.
 

A TOMB AWAY FROM VILLAGE

Her face dived into firewood stove

Mother cooked food in an earthen pot

Fire wood smoke choked her heart

Her body remained a skeleton

Flesh and muscles disappeared

With half stomach she condemned hunger

Suffered all the times with in

 filled our stomach full of best food ever

Keeping herself with water filled stomach

We swear with the straw filled hut

We swear with the smoke raising over the hut

We know her pleasant face ever

Not letting us to know her sufferings

The river of tears would flow for a life time

 tears soaked saree would tell her miseries

The fire wood collected from forest

 her hands and legs boozing with blood

Flowers of happiness were blossoming in her face

Wrinkled face covering her pains and sufferings

Mother waist like a bow down with old age

She gave us light keeping herself in darkness

Her eyes are oceans of miseries

We couldn’t understand her agony

Her wrinkled body

Like a soiled air bag used in a furnace

The cracks in her feet

Would always tried to break poverty

The time when we understood the mother’s sacrifices

She became a tomb away from my village.

Bullock Cart

Bullock Cart
--------------------

When I was in  eighth grade, in Sankranthi festival  holidays,  I want to go to my  aunt's  village . Every year I go and spend some time there with my cousins.  That village is ten miles east of my town. In those days , there was only one bus in the morning at 11 o clock. Bus name was Salamat Transport , it goes to Madanapalli  at 8 am and will be  back to our aunt's village at 2 pm en route  my town Mahal at 11 am ,  a six-hour journey from destination as it would stop in every village across the route and couldn't  pick up speed because of bad roads . Roads were in very bad shape with all bumps , slopes and granite .The bus some times over crowded with villagers and suddenly because of  engine failure or puncturing of tires which would  delay the bus for long hours . The model was the bus also very old as engine has to be run by way of turning a lever by hand to start the engine. Some times engine gets heated up and water has to be filled in the radiator to cool down the heated engine.Though it was horrible , we could enjoy the motor bus travel as it gives us lot of pleasure .Other wise , we have to engage a bullock cart to reach my aunt's village which takes almost a full day to reach the village.

It was my bad fate, the bus couldn't reach my town at 11 am . It was 3 pm , bus didn't  come, my father was very furious and angry as we waited for the bus for more than 5 hours. 

"For how long we have to wait ? This dirty bus is not coming .  Let us come tomorrow , post pone your travel '' My father was impatient and turned back to my  house.

But I was reluctant to go back to my house. I have planned  every thing to enjoy my vacation in my aunt's house . Already three days are over , only 7 days are left and again schools will reopen for fourth term. I want to play with my cousins and spend some happy times with them. Since they are land lords, they have plenty of agriculture lands and gardens. I want to enjoy swimming, loitering in the fields, eating fresh organic food. Also I can play with the cattle in their house. 

My father was impatient and unrest . 

''This dirty bus won't turn up in  a right time. We must go back to our home  .I already noticed morning the bad omen , when we started from our house. Our neighbor's cat came across the street, and I was doubtful of this travel'' 

My father told me to turn back to home.  My father believes in superstitions , as per the old age customs.

 I was very much disappointed and reluctant to go home , but of no avail. 

My father was furious and I shivered with fear after seeing face .

 I followed him silently . He told me that he will  drop me at Piler Bus stand  tomorrow morning as there are plenty of buses . 

I was happy.

=====================================================================

Next day, we reached Piler early in the morning and my father requested a gentleman to safely drop me at my aunt's house as he  was going to the same village. My father brought me some food stuff to eat in the bus and bade good bye asking me to take care of myself till I reach destination.

I reached my aunt's house at 11 am in the morning . Everyone in the house was waiting my arrival and my cousins hugged me out of joy. My aunt was kind enough to prepare lot of food stuff  for lunch , especially curries made up with cereals,  food with millets , sweets with fresh ghee and curds . Completely organic food served and we enjoyed delicious lunch typically of a south indian meals. 

===================================================

In the evening , my aunt told me that she would go to nearby village to buy new clothes for all members in the family for ensuing festival sankranti.  She asked me which colour do you prefer for shirt and half pant. I told her blue colour shirt and dark grey colour for half pant . I didn't try wearing full pants so far , as my father couldn't afford to buy  clothe for me. 

she instructed her workman ,  who was employed by her to get ready and arrange a bullock cart  for the nearest town as there was no bus facility  from that village . 

With little doubt, I asked my aunt that I will accompany her to the next village as I was very much anxious to ride bullock cart . 

'' Aunt , Pl allow me, I would like to come in the Bullock Cart.''

Some how,  she agreed to take me with her . 

I was very happy first time I was going in a bullock cart . 

I was sitting behind driver's seat , where the workman was riding the cart with the stick in his left hand and  two  leashes in his right hand controlling the bullocks. The leashes are tied through the nose of the bullocks and while stretching them, to the  right or left , the animals take the path as they carry heavy load of a wooden cart and the people sitting in the cart.

I asked the workman to give the leashes to me for riding the vehicle. My aunt objected as I am too young to ride a vehicle and the oxen will not listen for a new rider. Some how, I convinced my aunt and took the control of bullocks and cart.

The cart was going smoothly and I felt proud as I was able to ride a vehicle.

I stretched two leashes tied around the nose of Bullocks  , but out of fear , the animals missed the track , and one of the wheels of the cart mounted on a big stone  . Suddenly , with a big sound the entire cart fell down to the left side , there was a big hue and cry by the bullocks  and my aunt. We all fell down on the field , with bruises all over body. Blood was boozing from one animal , by seeing that I was shocked and lost senses . I cried a lot and my body and legs shivered  after that incident .

My aunt  some how came to the senses and set right the vehicle and bullocks and asked the workman to turn back to the home. 

She reprimanded and yelled for my over ambition for riding a cart with out experience .

The very next day, she asked workman to take me in the bus and drop me at my native village . 

I couldn't understand why my aunt suddenly suspended  me from enjoying my vacation in their house .